Thursday, 4 July 2013

Women really should marry women

Women really should marry women
3 July 2013
In many ways, our lives really would be simpler, if chicks simply married chicks.  Now I'm not propagating lesbian relationships or same sex marriages, though if that floats your boat, I'm all for it.  The point I'm trying to make, is that emotionally at least, women get other women.

Men?  They're a whole different species all together.  At times, not even human.  Or a subspecies thereof.

Intuitively women know what women like.  It's actually pretty obvious.  In most situations, think how you would react, feel and like to be treated, and simply follow and apply those rules.  If you give it some thought, you'll realise, it's a no-brainer.

None of this Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus mumbo-jumbo.  In fact, no mumbo-jumbo at all.  Everyone living in harmony.  All on the same page.

In fact, I think I would make some lucky woman, a lovely little wife.  If ever she said to me, "I've had a tough day at work", I'd run her a nice bath (with bubbles and lit candles on the side), pour her a cup of coffee (or a drink - I'll intuitively know exactly what she needs), fetch her the book she's busy reading, spoil her with Fererro Rocher choccies, and tell her that she's looking particularly slim and thin.  In fact downright skinny!

Men!  Given the same set of circumstances they're just ever so slightly obtuse.  Nah, who am I kidding!  Obtuse schmobtuse!  They're just plain thick!!!  Dense I tell you!

And I shall give you just one example to illustrate my point.  My little Berry's birth was a wee little bit stressful.  The long and short of it, was that it wasn't all straightforward and plain sailing.  Instead of leaving the hospital with my brand new pink bundle, three days after her birth, we only left after day six, and a brief stint in neo-natal ICU, followed by a stretch in High Care too.  Quite naturally I refused to leave the hospital without my baby and remained with her with for the duration of her stay.

And so eventually on day six we were finally discharged and were on our way home.  I remember being emotionally drained, though at the same time feeling elated to finally be heading home.  Absolutely exhausted because you don't sleep in a hospital.  And simply needing my space, my things, my bed, and my home.

We walked into our home after what felt like an eternity at about 12h00 in the morning.  Daddy Bear, Mommy Bear, Luke and new baby Amber.  I remember plonking down on the couch and taking a huge big deep breath, thinking, "Phew - we've made it!".

Until I glanced over at Daddy Bear, to find him looking at me expectantly.  Suspicion set in.  However it was only confirmed when he opened his mouth and said, "What's for lunch?". 

At which stage, in my opinion at least, Daddy Bear changed into an evil troll.  Combined with the Big Bad Wolf.  And an unhealthy dollop of ogre too.

If memory serves, I gave him my sweetest look, and said, "Whatever you feel like buying".

As I was saying - chicks really should just marry chicks and be done with it.  It is perfectly logical.  The side bonus being that there would be no need for the fake pretence of showing interest in their sport...

All things considered, it would be a win-win.

Which makes it such a pity, that I really fancy my man after all.



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