Friday, 15 August 2014

Chinese hairy leg stockings

Chinese hairy leg stockings
15 August 2014

Right!  So unwanted attention from men can be painful.  And annoying.  Especially if you’re not in the market for attention, that is.

Worst case scenario, it can be dangerous.

But fear not – the ever-entrepreneurial Chinese have come to our rescue.  With the most stupid invention ever.

Hairy leg stockings.

I kid you not.  Seriously!!!

As inventions go, I personally think it is a stellar example of idiocy.

And I can’t imagine there being a huge demand, nor market for these stockings.

We live in a world, where appearances are everything.  Vanity is all important.  And people pay large amounts of money to look their best.  The women of the species in particular.  They diet.  The pluck.  They wax.  They make-up.  They wear extraordinary painful outfits at time, because the look the part.  They squeeze their feet into high heeled shoes.  They wear thongs.

So the whole hairy-leg-stocking-thing leaves me a bit baffled.

Supposedly it is ideal to wear when travelling on public transport.  Trains, busses and subways.  Which is apparently where the men in China are obviously stalking their prey.  If the stocking manufacturers are to be believed.

I can’t imagine many young nor old women, venturing out in a pair of these bad boys.  Firstly, you’d have to wear closed shoes with your stockings, so your hairless feet don’t betray you.  Secondly, the assumption is that they’d match anything you own.  Or perhaps that’s the point and it shouldn’t.

The downfall of this little plan for the single ladies, is though they may supposedly be a bit more safe sporting the hairy wonders, they certainly won’t fall prey to handsome single young men either.

Perhaps the answer to unwanted attention from men, should be a bit more subtle and less obvious. 

Like a tazor gun.  Or bullet spray.

The last time some guy was staring at me lustfully, and he sidled over to me and said, “So where have you been my whole life?” (I swear – that was his line).

I smiled at him sweetly, looked him in the eye, and said, “With my husband”.

Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. 

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