A support group for anti-social people
1 June 2014
A support group for anti-social people. Wonder if they’ll ever meet and have an
actual meeting?
It’s a bit like the sign that read, “Clairvoyant’s meeting
cancelled until next week, due to unforeseen circumstances”.
The whole thing is a misnomer.
I’m a very social person.
I socialise easily with people.
Can make conversation with anybody.
Put anyone at ease, and converse easily with younger or older people,
from various different walks of life. About
any innocuous topic. It comes naturally
to me, and is not something I have to think about. I know that this is not a unique skill. That this doesn’t make me special in any
way. That it isn’t really a talent of
sorts. It’s just something I can
do. In inborn ability, like being able
to spell, sing, hit a ball, etc.
But I think that the world must be a very, very lonely
place for people who lack social skills.
Who find it difficult to connect with others. And for who this does not come naturally.
For some, life is awkward.
And social interaction is painful.
They’re inept at it. Don’t get
many of the social queues that you and I grasp and understand, without even
having to think about it. It’s as
natural as breathing in and out. In and
out.
But for them it’s painful.
I know a few people that are like this. And my heart aches for them. They don’t understand the finer nuances of
the social dance that people do. The
two-way communication thing.
The attempts they make at interaction are awkward. Uncomfortable. And mostly disingenuous. Lacking in warmth.
It’s like an inner stutter.
Not uttered verbally, but felt internally. And one they are unable to hide. Or mask.
Their discomfort shows. Plainly
so.
For those, unaware of their inability, I reckon it must be
easier. They’re most likely blissfully
unaware. Stumble through life, not
picking up on the odd looks of others. The
raised eyebrows, looks of confusion, the odd shake of the head.
But for those, able to identify that for them it’s
difficult, it must be horrible. Yet
somehow they can’t seem to bridge that gap.
Make the right moves. Say the
right things.
One of the things we take for granted in this world, is
communication. It is something we are
taught on our mother’s laps. And by
observing the world around us. The
problem being that for some people, though they were given the same equal
opportunity, have the necessary language skills and are intellectually
equipped, they simply can’t do it.
I look at those close to me who battle. Their life is fairly solitary. They’re lost on a ship, sailing who knows
where. All on their own. No close connection to anyone. No great bonds of friendship. No strong family links forged either.
I really feel their pain.
And say humble thanks that this is one area of life, I don’t have
problems with. And nor do my kids. Because as a parent, it must be
heart-breaking to witness.
Watching a kid that you love, being isolated and alone, must
be bloody awful!
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Self-centeredness is a symptom of depression and a sickness of our times.
ReplyDeleteIt is a awful because these are not skills one is really able to learn.
ReplyDeleteIt is reason for gratitude if it is easy. Very happy that my kids are also easy going and communicate easily.
None of you could do your jobs if you weren't.
xxx